The ability to perceive time — in other words: know how long something takes — is one of those very basic Boss Skills that you’re just supposed to “know how to do.” The same way you’re supposed to just “know how to budget for retirement.” Folks, this is a learned skill.
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If you do any prep before speaking up, I recommend working on some sentence starters that will diffuse confrontation — not overdo the argument.
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I am thinking specifically here of white people like me who are working among other white people and feeling the urgency — the need for growth plus a desire for growth. How do we keep going with accountability, every day from here on out?
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I find great relief in knowing that my job isn’t ever to stop a rumor from existing. It already exists! If Beyonce can’t get an “unflattering” picture off the internet, I’m certainly not going to be able to stuff a rumor back in its bottle. My job is to help surface the truth in the most useful way possible. As a manager, I’m more weatherman during a tornado watch than god of wind.
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Today we’re talking about delivering a certain flavor of feedback: the kind where the root behavior is good and worthy of being cultivated, but the results are bad and need to change. It’s a “yes, but no” type of feedback.
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It took me a long time to build up the confidence to let my team’s actions stand on their own, and not let my own insecurity take over. In the meantime, it’s helpful to have a process to fall back on — a sort of program you can mindlessly rely on when you may not be thinking clearly.
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So often we’re kind of trapped: on one side is our team, telling us that they’re unhappy, or that there’s a problem, or that something isn’t fair; and on the other is an entire institution that keeps on chugging along. There’s just not a lot of wiggle room in that space, which is why a lot of the time we wish the people on our teams could simply STOP COMPLAINING.
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What happens in your team’s chat is a direct reflection of your team’s culture. These are some of the biggest lessons we’ve learned about using messaging apps on the job.
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The point of any interview is to get concrete evidence that the candidate can or cannot meet the expectations you have for the role on your team. If you’re the hiring manager, you’ve got to calibrate with your team on what the ideal candidate will demonstrate, and what are dead-in-the-water dealbreakers.
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You know that scrambling, tunnel-vision feel you get when you’re in an interview and bombing a question? Imagine that, only with someone else’s job on the line.
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